Bad Movie Night 04/30/08- Tank Girl

Have you ever tried to make fun of someone and they keep making fun of them selves? Eventually you just loose all interest in trying to make fun of the person because their self depricating humor is funnier than yours. Watching Tank Girl is kind of like trying to make fun of Carrot Top while you are having a bad LSD trip. Except Naomi Watts is there looking exceptionally nerdy hot... ah Jet Girl you just became another adolesent fantasy. Take me away in your easily customizable jet... I swear I'm a better catch than a kangaroo frat boy. Maybe the movie should have been called Jet Girl instead of Tank Girl... eh, on second thought. Nevermind.

Tank Girl was determined to save money on establishing shots by using comic book panels. This was actually a really good idea. I mean who really needs to build the outside of a set? It's not like anybody talks about how good that set was built or how realistic that cg building was... frankly if you realize it's CG... it's really not all that realistic is it? Plus if you want to change the setting a little... all you have to do is draw it. No, scrapping sets. A lot of things were handled with vertigo inducing trippy cartoon sequences.

Within about 15 minutes of this movie starting... you will realize that you don't like the main character. She finds some redemption in my eyes just because of how defiant she is. I love defiance in the face of angry mad scientest corporated dudes. By the end of the movie they decide that it's a good idea to blow up the water place that is providing water to everybody... and that brings water back to the world that lacks the ability to rain. What? But, seriously... whenever you can say Ice T in a kangaroo suit made the movie better... you are either on drugs or watching Tank Girl.

Blood: Nothing too gory... there are a couple of torture scenes that are somewhere between real torture and the torture you will find in Barbarella. I mean if the bad guy had pulled out some gardening tools and started clipping off toes... I'm pretty sure Tank Girl would have broken like an egg on the windshield of a certain apartment resident. And, the Rippers... well they ripped stuff.

Boobs: Two words: Jet. Girl. *sigh* No nudity but who really needs it when Naomi Watts is wearing those librarian glasses.

Baddie: Forgettable. Malcolm McDowell plays a crazy bastard... he's obsessed with water. Ummm... He had his head cut off to be replaced with a hologram.

Boom: Well the movie is called tank girl so there was a little bit of boom. In the world of Tank Girl bullets are also magnetcally attracted to railings. And, at no time is this more clear than when she straps herself to the back of the tank and opens up a parachute to go after the badguys. Because if you aren't in the tank... landmines don't hurt the tank. Oh, and the bullets kept hitting the straps holding her to the parachute... but they didn't break the straps or hurt her.

Bad Acting: Oh... haha... There was a lot of bad acting. But, you have to wonder... was it that bad on purpose?